the strange encounter with the fourth kind...

at the rate of seventeen feet per second, my professor was digging a grave for me to be buried in. i had forgotten my report. worse, my professor was in a very foul mood. this is probably the worst combination ever, right after ramarajan's pink and green. i could see his contorted face, it was like seeing the blob, or the thing, or a combination of all the alien creatures ever conceived in those scary movies. the conversation:

blob: rip, tear, kill...

sub text: where is the report?

me: oops. i mean, sir?

explanation: never say oops. never ever use that word, even though its not a word. it cannot be accepted by professors/bosses/anything that barks. the word oops can as well be substituted with "please kill me and feed my arms and limbs to stray dogs".

blob: rip, flesh, blood, tasty.

sub text: what do you mean, sir? what the hell happened to the report, isnt it due today?

me: i know, i mean, i didnt. i mean, i wasnt sure. i actually thought it was.

explanation: that is probably the most stupid explanation a human being with even negligible quantity of white and gray matter can come up with. its hard to think on the feet, it is best to think of a valid lie, that can be validated by all possible means. i repeat, all possible means.(forget that, and you will pay for it dearly.)

blob:grrrrrrr.growl...thunderous sounds.

sub text: you had no idea, what kind of an answer is that? arent you old enough or should we talk about this when you start nursery classes again?

me: hushed silence. head bowed down, staring at the virus-parasite battle on the floor. virus-1, parasite-0 after round 1.

explanation: retribution in life comes at the later stage. you would want to maim him right now, or do something really bad to him like make him eat your dal, but have patience. there is always time to plot and scheme. conspiracies are not successful all the time.

blob: licks tongue on the chin. rolls its eyes.

sub text: now you forgot to talk? or you cannot talk anymore?

me: i am sorry.

explanation: dig your nails into the flesh, bury your face in the imaginary sand, muffle your voice in the imaginary handkerchief, ball your fist and slam it into an imaginary wall, blow out the imaginary steam out of your ears, and apologize. he pays, you live. he doesnt, you sit by the dumpsters, asking for quarters.

blob: subdued. turns around.

subtext: i am very disappointed, gautham.

me: *phew* i will finish it and turn it in today sir.

explanation: time for some tequila shots and jagermeister. whistling *always look on the bright side of life*...

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M F Hussain - The Greatest PAIN-ter of India???

“The Picasso of India” says one. “Pride of India” says Nirupama Rao. Now, is he truly what they describe him to be, i wonder.

Yes, he’s a painter, i agree. And Yes, he’s the best India has produced. No doubt.

Let me just ask you one question. If he had been born a non-Muslim and had he attempted to do the painting of a certain religious figure of Islam, how would the Muslim world have reacted?

The issue here is not about religious tolerance or sensitivity. Soutik Biswas of BBC writes (here)

“The story of Husain is one of the saddest of post-Independence India. It is a story of how the country's most famous painter has been hounded out while the state looked on.”

The issue at the core of his plight is his creativity. My point is Mr. Hussain being such a gifted painter that he is, why was he not creative enough to express his creativity in other ways than to paint Hindu Gods and Goddess in that way. Just because there are sensual and sexually explicit sculptures at places like Khajuraho, does not mean Hindu’s are open to it. Its akin to stripping a woman naked just because she lets her husband do it.

The problem with artists is that they take their Freedom of expression for granted. Mr. Hussain is 93 today and has lived through the most painful periods of our history - the partition, Indo-Pak wars etc. What has he done for the country with his creativity? I have not heard of any of his paintings that portray religious harmony. Certainly the media has not highlighted any of it - The Hindu included.

Certainly Hussain could have used his talent to good use. Not in the way he has.

Do you think he deserves all the accolade he’s getting? I certainly don’t.

I cant but wonder what would have happened to him had he used his creativity & played arnd with his own religion. Remember Salman Rushdie?

Clearly, Mr. Hussain is a smart man that he chose to play with the sentiments of Hindus who are tolerant and who even praise your work towards the twilight of your life.

My anger is not towards Hussain - rather the government and its censorship board for doing little to uphold the sanctity of India’ major religion.

Lord Krishna & Gopiyars

Who is the most influential person in this world? I should say Lord Krishna. Weather a person is good or bad, follower of hinduism or not, materialistic or spirtual, everyone is quoting Lord Krishna.

Numerous literaute, art forms,and actions are moulded after Lord Krishna's life and teachings.

Recently, an article about a prominent Swamiji had been great shock to us. Using the concept of Krishna & Gopiyars, he had cheated on the innocence of many beautiful young people.

The fraudulent Swamji had the intelligence to read what Lord Krishna had mentioned in geeta and mahabharata stories. He had witten and given so much spirtual discourse. He had visited numerous temples, did various noble acts like giving alms and building hosptials.Yet, now his name had been degraded and he had brought great dishonour to himself.

Now again the name of Lord Krishna and gopiyars are mentioned to justify evil acts.Swamiji had thought of himself as playful Lord Krishna and the ladies as gopiyars.

Just to share and clarify with the readers, according to the Bagawatha puranam, Lord Krishna was brought up by the cowherd girls called Gopiyars. For them Lord Krishna was like their son, and best friend. THe girls were enticed by the young lord krishna who was less than 16 years old. When he had killed the King Kamsa, he was only around 11 years. When Krishna was playful with the cowherd girls, he was only around 10+ years. All his playful pranks brought great joy to the people and they were attached to the adorable person. He was a 'theeratha vilayathu pillai'. And he was really a adorable child ( pillai). For many of the ladies, they had sang and dance with the adorable child. Their yearning was to be always with Lord Krishna.

Furthermore, when Lord Krishna had attained his adolescence and youth, he was busy fighting wars and doing high level diplomatic ties admist the highly chaotic situation of rivalry among friends and relatives.

So, I hope next time, no one should use Lord Krishna's lifestyle to justify their wrong deeds. Or come up with misleading comments like, ' thats what lord krishna did'.

Disclaimer: All comments are just for discussion only and not meant to offend anyone or propogate any ideology.