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Yesterday i was doing a chit chat with my chinese friend (xian fei) during our walk from office to home, i usually ask him some serious conspiracies. He is a pretty cool guy who handles the situation aptly. Since he is getting married with his long time sweet heart in china , i asked him the differences in the olden day chinese women and modern day.
His answer was pretty pragmatic, in olden days, a chinese woman did everything for her attached man whereas the modern day chinese man do everything (cooking is their major activity, as far as i know) for their attached woman. The women play a major role in decision making rather than being viewed as "baby-producing machines".
Immediately stuck to me is the desire of the indian women in the modern era who are equally educated (in terms of thinking according to me) as the men, they also work their ass-off for their families as the men claims !! So the indian women also expects her beloved to do atleast a minimum in everything or is it the responsibility of the metrosexual indian men to take into account the women equalism rather than they being assertive???
His answer was pretty pragmatic, in olden days, a chinese woman did everything for her attached man whereas the modern day chinese man do everything (cooking is their major activity, as far as i know) for their attached woman. The women play a major role in decision making rather than being viewed as "baby-producing machines".
Immediately stuck to me is the desire of the indian women in the modern era who are equally educated (in terms of thinking according to me) as the men, they also work their ass-off for their families as the men claims !! So the indian women also expects her beloved to do atleast a minimum in everything or is it the responsibility of the metrosexual indian men to take into account the women equalism rather than they being assertive???
Hehe, You have posted a good question. I think everyone should share equal burden in house.
ReplyDeleteWell, it really depends on the kind of women you get. Even for the modern-age Chinese man to be able to do everything for his career-oriented woman, there has to be something he gets in return that adds to the fulfillment of carrying out originally women-oriented tasks. It's really not possible for someone to continuously give in while getting absolutely nothing in return.
ReplyDeleteThe olden day Indian woman would have torn herself into pieces in order to take care of the home and if needed, career. I think many of our mothers are a testament to that with the amount of time and effort they have dedicated as homemakers and how little they have done for themselves because of the sacrifices they make in the name of family. The average olden day indian woman would wake up at around 4 or 5am, work endlessly through the day just to collapse around 11 in the night. In many cases, it wont be going too far to say that she was a 3-in-one: wife-mother-maid. You'd definitely see less of that with the modern day indian woman.
The modern day woman feels a greater need to put her education into better use, in building up a career either along side or before starting a family. She has her own opinions, her own perspectives and isn't in a clueless situation needing to take directions from someone else, let alone her husband. The more educated the modern indian woman, you can be sure that her expectations of equality will be higher. That doesnt mean she will treat her man as her maid. It just means wanting the guy to get more involved in the menial tasks of the home and not sit around expecting her to constantly clear up after you. When your sole duty is to be a homemaker, there is less space for demanding that the man of the house comes home from a hard day of work to help around with the cleaning and cooking. But when both partners are working equally as hard at their careers, there's nothing wrong in wanting some initiative, right?
But on a side note : Unless done willingly, just as how I feel it is wrong to expect the wife to do everything, modern era or not, it's equally as wrong to expect that the man do everything for the women. When done willingly, it's a testament to love. When forced, you can be sure the relationship is heading for disaster!
However, if you land up with a diva
@Anonymous I read ur comment. Our perception on contemporary women is very neat. It is worth noting that Indian men wants submissive wife. I may be wrong but it is a well known truth.
ReplyDeleteThe comments from Level 2 is really reasonable. I totally agree that if both have career work for the family, they should take equal responsibility for the house work. Of course, there is nothing that is equal especially in the family. As a result, the couple must be will to do this, and it is a testament to love.
ReplyDeleteI think whoever is good at cooking should do the cooking. Whoever earns more, should continue to work harder. Whoever is best in doing housework, just do it. I know of people who like thier father''cooking more than the mothers' cooking. I know of family whose mother has better career than father....
ReplyDeleteDon;t abuse anyone of them.
We shouldnt be saying that "ladies should cook, men should earn. Men dont do housework.'' please change this mentality. All should do their part , which they are good at. It took two hands to clap. BOth man and the lady, please work for the family , whichever way you are good at.dont bully or abuse the other person just because they are married to you.
Sry, kalai is also my shortened name. But i always been posting as kalaivani kandesan. That post from kalai is from me...(Kalaivani Kandesan)
ReplyDelete